Revision 796686068 of "Gold star gay" on enwiki

{{globalize/US|date=August 2017}}

'''Gold star gay''' is a term used by the [[LGBT]] community to describe a gay man who has never had a romantic or sexual relationship with a woman.<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.back2stonewall.com/2012/11/gold-star-gay.html |title=Are You A Gold Star Gay? |publisher=back2stonewall.com |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>

==Notable self-identified gold star gay men==
*[[Bisi Alimi]] - "I did date three girls...I kissed one...there was one that we were almost going to have sex and I was like, 'Oh my God, I can't stand it'...I've only dreamt of having sex with a man. I have never in my life, ever, consciously or unconsciously, been in a sexual relationship with a woman. Never" <ref>{{cite web|url=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJnjIeRWAYM| title=I have never had sex with a woman - 42 year old happily married Gay, Bisi Alimi |publisher=YouTube |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>
*[[John Barrowman]] - On an episode of the ITV panel show [[Celebrity Juice]], Barrowman described himself as a "gold star gay", specifying that he has "never had intercourse with a woman."<ref>{{cite web|url=http://attitude.co.uk/gino-dacampo-reveals-same-sex-experimentation-snogs-john-barrowman-on-celebrity-juice/ |title=GINO D’ACAMPO REVEALS SAME-SEX EXPERIMENTATION, SNOGS JOHN BARROWMAN ON ‘CELEBRITY JUICE’ |publisher=[[Attitude (magazine)|Attitude]] |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>
*[[Andy Cohen (television personality)|Andy Cohen]] - In Andy Cohen's memoir "Superficial: More Adventures from the Andy Cohen Diaries", Cohen revealed that his friends [[Kelly Ripa]] and [[Mark Consuelos]] encouraged him to have sex with a woman. Following their advice, Cohen planned to lose his gold-star by arranging a threesome with a married heterosexual couple. During the threesome, Cohen "did things with a girl for the first time in thirty years", events that "shocked" him because he considers himself to be "strictly dickly." However, Cohen still refers to himself as a "gold-star" because "I did not lose my virginity", meaning that he engaged in heterosexual acts other than [[penile-vaginal intercourse]].<ref>{{cite web|url=http://people.com/celebrity/andy-cohen-almost-threesome/ |title=Andy Cohen’s Quest to Lose His ‘Gold Star Gay’ Status Almost Ended with a Threesome |publisher=People Magazine |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref><ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.newnownext.com/andy-cohen-woman-virginity-threesome/10/2016/ |title=Andy Cohen Lost His Gold-Star Gay Status In A Threesome Two Years Ago |publisher=Newnextnow |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref><ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3860666/Threesomes-married-WOMAN-husband-Beverly-Hills-Housewives-really-dosed-pills-George-Amal-s-make-session-Bravo-s-Andy-Cohen-dishes-explosive-new-memoir.html?ito=social-twitter_dailymailceleb |title=EXCLUSIVE: Threesomes with a married WOMAN and her husband; Beverly Hills Housewives 'really dosed up on pills' and George and Amal's make-out session... Bravo's Andy Cohen dishes in explosive new memoir |publisher=The Daily Mail |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>
*[[Anderson Cooper]] - In an interview with Andy Cohen and Kelly Ripa, Cooper was asked if he had ever had sex with a woman. Cooper claimed that he had not done anything more with a woman than a kiss.
*[[Cakes da Killa]] - "I'm a gold star gay. Gold star gay mean like I never, once I came out of the vag, I never went back. That's gold star."<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.vladtv.com/article/224666/cakes-da-killa-on-never-getting-bullied-for-being-gay-rappers-being-corny?page=2 |title=EXCLUSIVE! Cakes Da Killa on Never Getting Bullied for Being Gay, Rappers Being Corny |publisher=[[Complex (magazine)|Vladtv.com]] |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref><ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/gay-hip-hop-artist-cakes-da-killa-dares-challenge-status-n742606 |title=Gay Hip-Hop Artist Cakes Da Killa Dares to Challenge the Status Quo |publisher=[[NBC News]] |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>
*[[Ronnie Kroell]] - Describing a film sex scene he acted in, Kroell said "I’m a gold star gay—I’ve never had sex with a woman—and this was the closest I got."<ref>{{cite web|url=https://www.outfrontmagazine.com/culture/hunky-ronnie-kroell-talks-new-film-his-penchant-for-full-frontal-nudity-and-getting-bloody/ |title=HUNKY RONNIE KROELL TALKS NEW FILM, HIS PENCHANT FOR FULL FRONTAL NUDITY AND GETTING BLOODY |publisher=[[Out Front (newspaper)|Out Front]] |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>
*[[Andrew Rannells]] - "I personally have never had sex with a woman. I'm more of what you call gold-star gay. I'm purebred...I feel like I'm in the minority for a lot of gay men. Most of my friends have tried [having sex with a woman] at some point.<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.vulture.com/2013/01/andrew-rannells-says-hes-a-purebred-gay-man.html |title=Andrew Rannells Says He’s a ‘Purebred’ Gay Man |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>

==Former or non-gold-star gay men==

*[[Colton Haynes]] - When asked if he was a gold star by Andy Cohen, Haynes said that he was not a gold star because he has slept with four women. He lost his virginity to a woman while still closeted and slept with three more women after having come out as gay.<ref>{{cite web|url=http://people.com/celebrity/colton-haynes-reveals-how-he-lost-virginity/ |title=Colton Haynes Reveals He Lost His Virginity at 13 — to a Girl and a Guy |publisher=[[People (magazine)|People]] |accessdate=2017-07-30}}</ref>
*[[Husbands (TV series)|Sean Hemeon]] - When asked by DenofGeek.com if he was a gold-star gay, Hemeon responded "No, no...I am not a gold-star gay. I tried very hard to be straight. Very hard. I had girlfriends."<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.denofgeek.com/tv/husbands/28369/jane-espenson-brad-bell-sean-hemeon-amy-acker-on-husbands |title=Jane Espenson, Brad Bell, Sean Hemeon & Amy Acker on Husbands |publisher=[[Dennis Publishing|Den of Geek]] |accessdate=2017-07-30}}</ref>
*[[Adam Lambert]] - In an interview with Out Magazine, Lambert stated "I’m curious. There are gay guys that gag and go 'eww' at the thought of having sex with a girl. I’m curious about it because I’ve never done it." He specified that he performed [[cunnilingus]] on a woman at age 18 for the first time, but didn't enjoy the experience.<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.out.com/entertainment/interviews/2009/11/12/adam-lambert-out-interview |title=Adam Lambert: The Out Interview |publisher=Out Magazine |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref> In 2015, Lambert revealed that he had satisfied his curiosity about heterosexual intercourse by losing his gold-star to a female friend: "I have [slept with a woman] before. I did it for the first time when I was 29. It was kind of a random thing, but I was very curious...It felt great. It was a friend of mine and there was tequila involved and a full moon and then suddenly...[Gives a wonderfully dirty chuckle]"<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.idolator.com/7590621/adam-lambert-sex-women-closeted-actors-gay |title=Adam Lambert Asked By ‘Glamour’ UK If He’d Ever Sleep With A Woman (Surprise — He Has!) |publisher=[[Idolator (website)]] |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>
*[[Blake Riley]] - In August, 2008, Riley appeared in the film [[Shifting Gears: A Bisexual Transmission]], a film directed by [[Chi Chi LaRue]] wherein multiple gay male pornographic actors have heterosexual sex for the first time. Despite facing criticism from his gay male fanbase, Riley claimed that he enjoyed sex with women and bragged that "I fucked a girl and I liked it" to the tune of Katy Perry's "[[I Kissed a Girl]]."<ref>{{cite web|url=https://avn.com/business/articles/gay/cameron-marshall-blake-riley-go-straight-54261.html |title=Cameron Marshall, Blake Riley Go Straight |publisher=Adult Video News |accessdate=2017-07-28}}</ref><ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.xcritic.com/forum/showthread.php?516433-Cameron-Marshall-and-Blake-Riley-Go-Straight |title=Cameron Marshall and Blake Riley Go Straight |publisher=[[DVD Talk|XCritic.com]] |accessdate=2017-07-28}}</ref> The film was controversial and lead to the term "[[Gay-for-pay|straight-for-pay]]" being coined to describe gay men doing straight porn.<ref>{{cite web|url=http://gay.fleshbot.com/5117422/we-watched-a-bisexual-movie-and-our-eyes-did-not-melt-and-fall-out-of-our-head |title=We Watched A Bisexual Movie And Our Eyes Did Not Melt And Fall Out Of Our Head |publisher=[[Fleshbot]] |accessdate=2017-07-28}}</ref>

==Other==

*[[Tom Ford]] - In an interview with [[Details Magazine]], Ford claimed that every gold-star gay man should have sex with a woman at least once. He further stated that many gay men would be surprised to find out they enjoy sleeping with women, if they tried it first: "There’s one indulgence every man should try in his lifetime: If you’re straight, sleep with a man at least once, and if you’re gay, don’t go through life without sleeping with a woman. Either way, you might be surprised at how natural it will feel if you can get past the mind-fuck of stereotypes. In the end, it’s just another person that you’re relating to in a physical way."<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.wmagazine.com/story/15-times-tom-ford-has-waxed-poetic-about-sex |title=15 Times Tom Ford Has Waxed Poetic About Sex |publisher=[[W Magazine]] |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref>

==Gold stars in popular culture==

[[Blaine Anderson]] (played by [[Darren Criss]]), a fictional character from the American musical comedy-drama television series [[Glee (TV series)|Glee]], is presented as a gold star gay man. In "[[Diva (Glee)|Diva]]", the thirteenth episode of the fourth season, Blaine says that he is a "perfect gold star gay" after [[Tina Cohen-Chang]] asks him if he has ever slept with a woman.<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.billboard.com/articles/news/1538557/glee-recap-meltdowns-train-wrecks-and-other-diva-behavior |title='Glee' Recap: Meltdowns, Train Wrecks and Other 'Diva' Behavior |publisher=Billboard.com |accessdate=2017-07-01}}</ref><ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.hypable.com/glee-recap-4x13-diva/2/ |title=‘Glee’ recap: 4×13 ‘Diva’ |publisher=2017-07-01}}</ref>

==Writings about gold star homosexuality==
In an essay titled "Why I Won’t Fuck A Girl Again", [[Jezebel.com]] writer Zack Rosen describes his experience in college of being a non-gold star and having "a lot of pride in not being a gold-star gay". His "ultimate public act of rebellion, oddly enough, was acting straight." He was sexually active with women partly because he was "aggressively, obnoxiously anti-gay-culture" as a closeted gay man and wanted to reject everything "gay guys did", and partly because "It worked as a temporary solution in that my testicles didn't explode" because he "had fun, and it helped me learn what a blowjob was like before my penis grew back into itself from disuse."<ref>{{cite web|url=http://jezebel.com/5791389/why-i-wont-fuck-a-girl-again |title=Why I Won’t Fuck A Girl Again |publisher=[[Jezebel.com]] |accessdate=2017-07-28}}</ref>

== See also ==
{{Portal|LGBT}}
*[[Gold star lesbian]]
*[[Virginity]]

==External links==
{{Wiktionary|gold star gay}}
*[https://goodmenproject.com/marriage-2/a-gay-mans-sex-with-women/ A Gay Man's Sex With Women]
*[http://everydayfeminism.com/2016/09/gold-star-lesbian-platinum-gay/ 6 Reasons We Shouldn’t Say ‘Gold Star Lesbian’ or ‘Platinum Gay’]
*[http://affinitymagazine.us/2017/03/28/its-time-to-dump-gold-star-labels/ It’s Time to Dump “Gold Star” Labels]
*[http://www.gaycalgary.com/News.aspx?id=1732 NSFW - Steam Room Stores: Are you a Gold Star Gay?]

==References==
{{Reflist}}

{{LGBT slang}}

[[Category:Gay culture]]
[[Category:Gay history]]
[[Category:Homophobia]]
[[Category:Homophobic slurs]]
[[Category:LGBT history]]
[[Category:LGBT terminology]]
[[Category:Pejorative terms for people]]
[[Category:Reclaimed words]]
[[Category:Sexual abstinence]]