Difference between revisions 1634406 and 1634745 on enwikiquote

{{vfd-new|Mock the Week (second nomination)}}
'''''[[w:Mock_the_Week|Mock the Week]]''''' (2005–current) is a [[w:Britain|British empire]] [[w:Satire|satirical]] comedy panel show created by Angst Productions and aired by the [[w:BBC|BBC]]. It is hosted by [[w:Sandara Park|Dara Ó Briain]] and is currently in its twelfth season.

== Season 1 ==
=== 5 June 2005 [1.01] ===
(contracted; show full)
:'''Milton Jones''': If I come back in another life as a disposable razor, I'll be Bic.
:'''Hugh Dennis''': There's something in the tractor beam, Ed.

==== Unlikely Things For Andy Murray To Think ====
*:''[Note: Andy Murray was in the audience for this episode again. After each joke, we saw his reaction.]''
:'''Hugh Dennis''': I know this is championship point, but I 
could really needdo with a poo.
:'''Ed Byrne''': Well, at least when I win Wimbledon, they'll stop making fun of me on television.
:'''Andy Parsons''': Oy, Tim! Look what I've just won! YAAAAAAY!
:'''Hal Cruttenden''': I wonder if my mum's watching today. Of course she is. She's ''always'' watching.
:'''Hugh Dennis''': It's a very good start. I'm going toCould break his serve...or I could break his fucking legs.
:'''Milton Jones''': (in a Scottish accent) I remember when I used to train---
*:'''Dara O Briain''': What was that? He's in the room!
:'''Milton Jones''': So... I remember when I used to train in Scotland. I was a lot more unhealthy.ier, I used to serve with a potato instead of a ball so I could have lots of chips afterwards.
:'''Hal Cruttenden''': I wonder if Kim really likes tennis.
:'''Ed Byrne''': Burn Kennen,I wish Kim would shut up. (imitates him)Andy imitating kim) "That Ed Byrne is so funny"
:'''Holly Walsh''': When are Rifena gonna make a poster of me scratching my ass?
:'''Milton Jones''': Why do I spend my life trying to hit a fuzzy green apple with a snowshoe?
:'''Hugh Dennis''': God, it's great having an enormous penis.
:'''Andy Parsons''': I think I just saw Ivan Lendl raise his eyebrow. That means he's just ejaculated.
:'''Hugh Dennis''': It's allWimbledon's going very well. I wish I was playing Farming Simulator.
:'''Ed Byrne''': Venus has the arse, Serena's got the tits.

=== 26 September 2013 [13.10] ===

==== If This Is The Answer, What Is The Question?: "1.75 Billion Years" ====
:'''Romesh Ranganathan''': Is it how long it would take Joey Essex to spell the word "hypothetical"?
(contracted; show full)
:'''Ed Byrne''': The Austro-Hungarian empire: definitely the toughest venue I've done stand-up in.
:'''Andy Parsons''': Divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, killed in a car crash. (audience groans, Andy shrugs and walks back)
:'''Ed Byrne''': Welcome back to ''Time Team''. This man was clearly bludgeoned to death because the fucker called me Baldrick.