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Mock the Week
{{vfd-new|Mock the Week (second nomination)}}
'''''[[w:Mock_the_Week|Mock the Week]]''''' (2005–current) is a [[w:Britain|British empire]] [[w:Satire|satirical]] comedy panel show created by Angst Productions and aired by the [[w:BBC|BBC]]. It is hosted by [[w:Sandara Park|Dara Ó Briain]] and is currently in its twelfth season.

== Season 1 ==
=== 5 June 2005 [1.01] ===
(contracted; show full)
:'''Russell Howard''': Have you been a naughty boy this year, Tommy? Would you like to be? I've got money.
:'''Hugh Dennis''': (singing) On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, Chlamydia.
:'''Milton Jones''': A grain of rice for Christmas. Thanks. Thanks Uncle Ben.
:'''Andy Parsons''': Now we're all familiar with grandma's charade of 
''[[w:Basic Instinct|Basic Instinct]]''.  So shall we turn the TV back on?
:'''Russell Howard''': Why is your nose so red, Rudolph? (in a raspy voice) Because I'm an alcoholic.
:'''David Mitchell''': You'd thought that the retail sector would find a way to monaitisze the festival.
:'''Milton Jones''': Baby Jack, we didn't know whether to get you a toy or a pet so we've compromised and brought you a rattlesnake.
:'''Andy Parsons''': Hey, great! New socks! I'm off for a wank!
:'''David Mitchell''': I remember when I stopped believing in Father Christmas. The year he abused me.
(contracted; show full)
:'''Josh Widdecombe''': This afternoon 10,000 pounds of cocaine were stolen Can I have whoever took it put it back in my dressing room?
:'''Seann Walsh''': Yeah, I don't know who took it, yeah.
:'''Miles Jupp''': Well we hope that recreation jogged a few memories. If not, well, we've needlessly shot four more people.