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Mock the Week
'''''[[w:Mock_the_Week|Mock the Week]]''''' (2005-current) is a [[w:Britain|British]] [[w:Satire|satirical]] comedy panel show created by Angst Productions and aired by the [[w:BBC|BBC]]. It is hosted by [[w:Dara Ó Briain|Dara Ó Briain]] currently in its twelfth season.

== Season 1 ==
=== 5 June 2005 [1.01] ===
(contracted; show full)
:'''Carl Donnelly''': And now we're gonna head over and see what the polls are telling us... HULLO!
:'''Hugh Dennis''': Right, now, let's go over to Wales and see what they're saying to us. (mooing noise)
:'''Andy Parsons''': And so we have a question here for the Prime Minister from Nancy Cameron, aged eight. And it's: "When are you going to pick me up, daddy?"


=== 28 June 2012 [12.03] ===

==== If This Is The Answer, What Is The Question?: TBA ====

:This round of ITITAWITQ? will be posted as soon as someone uploades the episode.:

==== Scenes We'd Like To See: Unlikely Things To Read On A Health Insurance Form ====

:'''Andy Parsons''': Would you describe the conditions of your heart as A: very good, B: medium good, or C: BOO!
:'''Hugh Dennis''': Do you ever... temporary blackouts?
:'''Chris Addison''': Do objects in the middle distance appear to be coming to me, to you, to me, to you? You may be suffering from "Chucklevision".
:'''Zoe Lyons''': Are you suffering from or have you ever had an STD, you slag?
:'''Gary Delaney''': Are you the only black guy in a horror film?
:'''Andy Parsons''': Have you ever experienced a buring sensation when you pee? Were you drunk at the time and holding a cigarette at the same time?
:'''Marcus Brigstocke''': Please describe your alcohol intake: Moderate, Average, Excessive, Glaswegian.
:'''Gary Delaney''': What's your blood type? It can do 50 words a minute, in it, bruv.
:'''Andy Parsons''': Footists: What was your last cause of death?
:'''Chris Addison''': Do you suffer from dyslexia? If so, please put a bick in this tox.
:'''Hugh Dennis''': Do you smoke? Can I have one?
:'''Zoe Lyons''': Do you hear voices? No. Are you deaf? No. So you do hear voices? Yes. I'm sorry, you have lied.
:'''Andy Parsons''': Would you describe yourself as very fit, quite fit, or a bit of a minger?
:'''Hugh Dennis''': Do you suffer from dizziness, double vision, or seizures? Then why did you take a penalty for England?

==== Unlikely Lines From A War Movie====

:'''Chris Addison''': Bad luck, Sir Winston. I'm afraid the Second World War's gone to penalties.
:'''Hugh Dennis''': I'm going to rescue a horse that's trapped in the wire. You put the potatoes on.
:'''Andy Parsons''': We've located the battleship. It is located in the squares B5, B6, B7, 8, 9.
:'''Hugh Dennis'''': I was sent upriver in Vietnam, tasked with killing a renegade colonel. That was one hell of a gap year.
:'''Zoe Lyons''': I haven't seen a case of trench foot this bad since the Isle of Wight festival.
:'''Gary Delaney''': It is better to live on your feet than die on your knees. Anyway, enough about that Tulisa video.
:'''Andy Parsons''': Well, if nothing else, this is going to make a lovely tapestry.
:'''Chris Addison''': We're at 5,000 fathoms! Bing. The Hull'll never take it, captain! Bing. and you going "Bing" isn't helping, either!
:'''Andy Parsons''': Louie, this could be the start of a beautiful friendship, but only if you dress up as a nurse and give me a discharge.
:'''Marcus Brigstocke''': Sir, new intelligence has come from the Letters page of the Daily Mail, and it seems Herr Hitler has a point.
:'''Hugh Dennis''': (acting startled and trying to cover his ears) I can't stand sound of the guns. Why did I move to Tottenham?
:'''Gary Delaney''': In the Marines, our motto is "No one gets left behind". Private Cameron, where is your daughter?
:'''Hugh Dennis''': We make an amphibious landing here. We scale the cliff, avoid the sweeper, bounce on the big balls, and I'll meet you in the Wipeout Zone.
:'''Marcus Brigstocke''': Chaps, we're about to go over the top, and I have a message for you form High Command. It simply says, [[w:War(song)|"War! What is it good for? Absolutely nothin'! Say it again now! War!"]]
:'''Zoe Lyons''': Don't put your stuff in that one. It's got a really catchy edge. I call it "The Hurt Locker".
:'''Chris Addison''': Medic! Medic! Medic! I'll tell you what the problem is. I've been shouting "Medic!"⏎
⏎
== External links ==
{{wikipedia}}
* {{imdb title|0463827|Mock the Week}}
[[Category:Current shows]]