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Mock the Week
{{vfd-new|Mock the Week (second nomination)}}
'''''[[w:Mock_the_Week|Mock the Week]]''''' (2005–current) is a [[w:Britain|British empire]] [[w:Satire|satirical]] comedy panel show created by Angst Productions and aired by the [[w:BBC|BBC]]. It is hosted by [[w:Sandara Park|Dara Ó Briain]] and is currently in its twelfth season.

== Season 1 ==
=== 5 June 2005 [1.01] ===
(contracted; show full)
:'''[[w:Frankie Boyle|Frankie Boyle]]''': Temperatures could rise to 31 degrees. '''SHIT, I'VE LEFT MY BABY IN THE CAR!!'''
:'''[[w:Russell Howard|Russell Howard]]''': A hurricane tonight will be caused by low pressure and God's hatred of homosexuality.
:'''Frankie Boyle''': A huge depression over Scotland, and now the weather.
:'''
Hugh Dennis''': So here's the summary: Monday – Shite, Tuesday – Shite, Wednesday – Shite, Thursday – Bollocks.[[w:Frank Skinner|Frank Skinner]]''': And finally a warning to hay fever sufferers: Don't come sneezing near me or I'll rip you face off. 
:'''Hugh Dennis''': So here's the summary: Monday – Shite, Tuesday – Shite, Wednesday – Shite, Thursday – Bollocks.
:'''Andy Parsons''': The humidity's rising, the barometer's going low. Tonight, for the first time, just about half past ten, it's gonna start raining men. 
:'''Frankie Boyle''': Yeah, it looks bright for the weekend, I've got three grams of coke in my pocket, and my wife's on holiday. 
:'''Hugh Dennis''': Well, let's go to Carol on the roof of the television center. She's not meant to be there, she's just a bit depressed. 
:'''Frankie Boyle''': This part of the country is gonna stay hot and wet for quite some time. Because that's where my girlfriend lives, Oh yeah!
:'''Russell Howard''': It was raining cats and dogs last night. I should know, I was throwing them off my roof.
:'''[[w:Gina Yashere|Gina Yashere]]''': What are you watching me for? Look out the fucking window!
:'''Frank Skinner''': It's gonna be cloudier tonight. I love those german birds. ⏎
:'''Frankie Boyle''': What do you care what the weather's gonna be like? You look shit in all your clothes!

==== Deleted Lines from Star Trek ====
:'''Frankie Boyle''': This is the Federation of Gay Planets. Open your docking bay and prepare to be boarded!
:'''Frankie Boyle''': What's wrong, Captain Picard? WHAT'S WRONG?! I'M A [[w:Patrick Stewart|SERIOUS SHAKESPEAREAN ACTOR]] AND I'M TALKING TO THE AMBASSADOR OF THE FUCKING WORM PEOPLE!

=== 16 July 2009 [7.02] ===

(contracted; show full)
:'''Ed Byrne''': The Austro-Hungarian empire: definitely the toughest venue I've done stand-up in.
:'''Andy Parsons''': Divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, killed in a car crash. (audience groans, Andy shrugs and walks back)
:'''Ed Byrne''': Welcome back to ''Time Team''. This man was clearly bludgeoned to death because the fucker called me Baldrick.